A visit from a friend
by Harbinger of Death
The doorbell rang (knelled, really, as is appropriate for a death
mansion) and the Harbinger of Death answered. There stood the Easter Bunny, his friend
from way back, looking a little ragged around the edges, but much better these days than
he'd been in the recent past.
"Bunny!" Harbinger said, and embraced the fluffy fellow. "Come on in. Why
didn't you tell me you were out of rehab? I would have picked you up."
"I just took a cab," said EB. "I didn't want to bother you."
"It's no bother. You're a friend. Come in, come in." Harbinger ushered him in
and sat him down. "So, how do you feel?"
"Not bad," said Bunny. "It's good to see the sun again. I still go back for
weekly counseling, but I get to be on my own now."
"Good for you. I'm proud of you. It takes a big rabbit to admit he has a
"Yeah, well, I'm a big rabbit," grinned the six-foot furball. "So what have
you been up to since last Halloween?"
"Oh, this and that," remarked HoD. "I travelled a little, did some odd
jobs. I used to give after-death experiences, since some of the rich bored folks were
looking for a thrill, but then a few of them really did die later and were asking for
personal favors, wanting to be reanimated for real, since we were 'buddies' and all
"Don't you just hate when people take advantage that way," clucked the Easter
"Tell me about it. So now I just do the occasional *near-*death experience. But
mostly I serve as a party consultant now. Halloween parties are all the rage this year.
That's why I haven't been able to get to the Debs as early as last year. So many people
are throwing masquerades and want my advice on decorations and haunted houses and so on.
Plus I've done a few singing telegrams for 'Over the Hill' birthdays."
"Sounds fun," said EB. "And right up your alley. Hey, you got anything in
the fridge?" He made his way to the kitchen.
"Yeah, but don't have any of the wine," warned HoD. "It's poisoned,
naturally. Even if it weren't, I don't want to have to take you back to the clinic."
"Don't worry. I'm on the wagon. I can't afford to miss my deliveries next April.
There's not much work for an out-of-work holiday icon."
"That's what I thought, but you'd be surprised," said Harbinger. "You can
get mall gigs easy, birthday party appearances, all of that."
"That'd be great, except I don't like kids that much."
"Well, you're in the wrong holiday, aren't you. At least you're not Santa
"Yeah, then I'd really be screwed." EB popped a soda open and sat back down on
the couch. "Hey, you need a hand this year with the Debs? I could use something to
keep me occupied. Helps with the cravings."
"Sure. Especially since I'm starting so late. Just make sure to run everything by me
so I can verify it's within the parameters."
"Thanks, dude. I really appreciate it."
"Anything for a friend." Harbinger patted him on the back. Poor bunny. Some
people just didn't handle seasonal pressure very well.
Posted on Oct 18 2000