The CAP (part1 teaser)
by Bt
“GBt?” Shana, Bt’s great-granddaughter knocked quietly, on the partially
open office door.
“Shana?” came the slightly muffled reply from behind a mountain of paper,
“Come on in, if you can find where in is.” Bt. continued. “I don’t
know why I even bother with this! The stack gets higher and higher and there’s never
a chancellor around to sign off on it even if I do all the processing,” the
exasperated CA said as a large pile of papers obeyed the, as yet undiscovered law of
gravity, and slid silently towards the floor. It never quite made it since it landed on
another stack which caused another mini paper slide almost burying Lucky The Wonder Dog
who was trying to catch a quick nap before lunch. The Wonder Dog gave her human a
reproachful look and retreated to another corner of the room settling back down with an
audible grumbling sigh.
“I’m afraid I’ve got another one to add to your stack.” Shana said as
she handed a scroll to Bt.
“Oooo, fancy!” Bt replied, looking at the ornate seal and purple silk ribbons
that adorned the high quality parchment. Then, with out the slightest hesitation, she
broke open the seal and began to scan the contents of the scroll which had clearly been
addressed to “The Esteemed Chancellors of Debaucherette University”.
Shana, smiled a little remembering the shock she’d experienced the first time
she’d seen GBt calmly reading the chancellor’s personal mail. Since then,
she’d learned that this action was not so much a form of snooping, as she’d at
first thought, but a necessity brought on by the chancellors almost compulsive disregard
for the day to day operation of the institution they supposedly ran.
If the CAs had not, on their own volition, taken over most of the management, the
university would have long ago collapsed into complete ruin. None the less, there were
certain things which needed a chancellor’s signature and the pile of papers and
scrolls on Bt’s desk and floor probably represented the current crop of items that
fit that category. Lately, in a gesture of either co-operation or out right desperation
the CAs had begun pooling the most urgent items and whenever one unfortunate chancellor
was located, getting as many signatures as possible from the chancellor before writers
cramp set in. Bt’s desk had, by common consent or perhaps a loosing night at cards,
become the central repository for documents requiring signatures.
“This invitation almost sounds like one of Sal’s schemes,” Bt remarked.
“Listen to this.” she continued. “The Acme 2000 Consortium for Higher
Education invites the Esteemed Chancellors of Debaucherette University to our semi-annual
symposium. Our theme for this summer’s series will be, “Strategies for Securing
Government Grants”. Lectures, workshops and poster sessions will be presented to give
YOU the edge in writing and receiving those all important government funds!
This year our symposium will be held at that fabulous resort facility in Lost Wages,
“Julius’ Pleasure Palace”. (Under new management) Reservations required!
Get yours in early - attendance limited to.....
That’s funny,” Bt murmured, “The line listing the number of attendees is
all smeared. Oh, well, having the chancellors go off on another resort trip is the last
thing we need right now.........or is it? Hmmmm....”
“GBt?” Shana inquired, a little worried at the far off look in her
grandmother’s eyes.
“Hmm, what?” Bt came back to reality from whatever pleasant place she had been
visiting.
“Shana, see how many CAs you can round up. Tell them to meet me here in 15 minutes.
Move it girl! This is important!”
Posted on Jul 29 1999, 12:31 PM
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